Mediate Michigan

While our culture has always seemed able to cope with the idea of fathers as warriors–think of all those photographs on the front page of your local newspaper, featuring a returning soldier seeing his baby for the first time, or reuniting with older children–we may be less able to handle the idea of deploying mothers. We have learned, through watching countless war movies, that the bonds forged between (male) comrades during war can be stronger than those of family, but it may be a surprise to learn that this is true for many women as well.

As Marine Sgt. Jocelyn Proano, who joined the military after being expelled from high school, told me about getting her deployment orders when her daughter had just turned one year old: “That was the worst ever — to leave my kid and everything.” Yet she found her feelings for her daughter were in conflict with her military training: “The mommy mentality left me as soon as we got on that bus. All of a sudden, the Marine hit me.” Sgt. Proano ended up extending her deployment so she would not have to leave her unit: “You want to be a Marine, and you can’t be a mom all the time.”

via Impact of War – When Mommy goes to war (leaving the kids behind).